Find Your Strongest Life: A review

// October 6th, 2009 // No Comments » // Books, Daily Life, Success

OK. So you are probably wondering what I’m doing reviewing a book for women. Well, I’m married to one. I’m also rearing two daughters. When I had the chance to review Find Your Strongest Life: What the Happiest and Most Successful Women Do Differently, through Thomas Nelson’s Book Review Blogger program, I thought it would open me up to a world that is somewhat of a mystery to us guys. Boy was I right. I asked my wife to read it first and I was going to do an interview style post, but I found enough information in it to warrant a review myself.

Marcus Buckingham has worked with the Gallup organization for several decades and has gathered a plethora of information on women and the struggles they face with self worth, value, and their place in society today. One particular topic that I found most interesting is how two seemingly identical women (in terms of life story, age, education, etc) could end up with such different paths, one being rather happy and fulfilled while the other was “dying” at her job, significantly unfulfilled. Marcus shares several factors in each woman’s response to the choices they faced and how those choices, not bad choices on the outset, affected their sense of happiness and success.

The book also contains a section on living a strong life. He’s developed a test called the Strong Life Test for women. The test shows which are your strongest life roles, with a lead role and a supporting role. My wife took the test and I thought I would to since I’d be writing about it. It was interesting and surprisingly confirming to see the results.

The best part of this whole experience is that it got us talking again about things that up to now we thought were differences or weaknesses in ourselves and each other. Now we see them as just different strengths. So I would encourage women and men to take a look at this book and learn what you can from it. For guys, it just might help you understand your wife a little better.

Cut me, Mick

// April 8th, 2009 // No Comments » // Economy, Success

Rocky couldn’t see anymore.  He’s in the corner blinded by the swelling from the beating he was taking from Apollo Creed. He says to Mick, his trainer,

My eye… Cut me, Mick… Cut me… Cut me.

After a bit of hesitation, Mick tells his assistant to do it. This is hollywood of course, but what a great picture of a desire to win.  Rocky got his sight back and thus a renewed vision for victory.

We need that sometimes when our focus becomes narrow or when everything just seems dark and hopeless.  I had several comments yesterday after posting my short tweet about the availability of work in today’s “weak” economy.  My quote was something like “It’s out there if you want it.”  I know that is hard to hear when you are losing your home and I”m not suggesting a quick fix.  But I believe this particular bit of advice is apropos to our times.  I stated five things that help me stay on task as I navigate the economic times in business.

1. Avoid Naysayers - Consider the sources where you get your economic outlook.  You’ve probably heard it from some media outlets that subtly or with intention are hoping you’ll buy into the doom and gloom.  Or maybe its a “friend” that likes misery in mixed company. This is caustic if listened to regularly because it is a hope killer.  You don’t know how many people I talk to who run their own businesses that say “Boy, the economy hasn’t hit my industry yet.  I wish things would slow down a bit.”  If you look, you’ll find opportunities for beginning a business or employment opportunities if starting a business is not your thing. It’s out there.

2. Stay Hungry - Why are these small business owners, the ones that are having market success, actually having success? I think it is a combination of things.  Good products, smart business practices, customers who love them, steady growth, being experts at what they do, balanced life, the list goes on… But I believe there is a deeper desire within each: an unstoppable personal drive.  Not sitting back on past successes.  Not resting on ones laurels, so to speak.

3. Take Risks - This doesn’t mean throw your brain out the window, blindfold yourself, and play pin the tail on the donkey with your life. It does mean conquer the fear that keeps you from going after something. From experience, I think fear kept me from achieving the dreams I’d visualized earlier in life. It wasn’t until the fear was gone that I could make those cold calls and build those relationships, required for success in building a business.

4. Don’t go it alone - When you are an island, you are a target.  The bullseye on your back has the crosshairs of a force much greater than you focused on it.  And you can’t handle it alone.  There is an enemy out there that is willing to let you go it alone and will even provide you all the success you want: at a price! At the expense of your family, your relationship with God, and in some cases at the expense of your own soul. It is a series of turns you make when you come to forks in the road that appear harmless on the outset, but will allow you to be isolated from others over time. It can turn you upside down and in the end make you wish you’d never gone down that road to begin with.  I’ve seen it.  It is not good.  A husband can’t expect to spend every waking minute through a decade of marriage working to grow a business while neglecting his wife and not expect something to break. It’s preventable.  Surround yourself with like-minded and successful people.

5. Give Thanks - To whom you might ask?  God, your wife, your kids, mentors, pastors, parents, business partners, teachers.  More than likely there are many people who have added to or assisted with your success. Either through giving you time to succeed or advice on how to do it.  Don’t forget to remember them.

So don’t be afraid to get a little dirty, a little bruised, perhaps even needing to do some minor surgery on your sight. There is victory ahead.